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The Guest
Refrigerator Door

New magnets!  These are from Sunshyn of Sunshyn's Daydreams... she has almost as many magnets as I have!

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(well, of course!)


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Becoming a Man:
Half a Life Story

Paul Monette

My Amazon wish list


year-end retrospective
and Biography of the Year:
Rudy Giuliani

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Just say "No" to the Salvation Army.

If anybody is looking for an alternative place to donate money this season, I'm not going to make a big pitch this year because you were all so incredibly generous last year, and I don't want to feel that I'm taking advantage of anybody, but Priscilla is again saddled with her 7 grandchildren, is being operated on for her rectal cancer on December 10, and all the resources for Christmas assistance have dried up. 

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Our family is  "adopting" her family again this year, but if anybody would like to make a donation for her Christmas, it can be sent to

Breaking Barriers
1722 J St., Ste. 321
Sacramento, CA 95814

and be sure to say that it's for Priscilla, since they are working on finding Christmas assistance for a lot of people.

(I'm including the BB address because I'm uncomfortable that people might think I'm using the money for myself or something.)



11 December 2001

I think I mentioned the response I received to my annual letter to the editor about the Boy Scouts and asking people not to support the bigotry of the Boy Scouts of America by purchasing a tree at the Boy Scout Christmas tree lot. Also in that letter, I reminded people of the homophobic hiring policies of the Salvation Army and asked that they spend their holiday philanthropic dollars elsewhere, with some organization that is accepting of all people.

In the letter, I reminded people that it was intolerance taken to extremes which resulted in the collapse of the World Trade Center and asked if we couldn't all learn to live together in peace and love.

Every time I write a letter like this, I know I'm going to hear from an elderly homophobic curmudgeon and I was not disappointed. In fact, he must be getting senile because he sent me three letters, all essentially the same. The shorter one reads:

Somehow, some way, your fertile mind has linked homosexuality with September 11. By what occult means did you manage to do this?

My response to your message? I'm increasing my monies to both the BSA and the S.A. Indeed, I will again be ringing the bell this season.

No, Mrs. Sykes, this has nothing to do with homophobia. It has to do, just incidentally, with rejection of stupidity.


I mentioned his letters in another letter to the editor, commenting on the love that I saw displayed at a recent Candlelight vigil on World AIDS Day, and commenting that I wished the curmudgeon could feel some of the acceptance and compassion that I saw exhibited that night.

I then received a letter from a lesbian couple I've never met. It has warmed the cockles of my heart:

We wanted to send you some fan mail to counteract the mean-spirited mail that you mentioned in your letter to the editor today.

We have long admired your logically compassionate letters to the editor. They always make us smile. It's because of wonderful and eloquent people as yourself that allows families like ours to have the strength to live openly.

We have often remarked that we should invite you to dinner to show our appreciation. Please accept the enclosed invitation to our annual cookie exchange. We would be honored by your presence.

Fancy that. Someone would be honored by my presence. Someone thinks I'm eloquent. Does that ever strengthen my resolve to continue the fight?

I am not a party person.

I am especially not a person who enjoys going to parties with a bunch of people I don't know and if I can't get out of it, I tend to stick with the people that I do know.

Going to a party that will be filled with people that I don't know—where I will know nobody—is the very last thing that I would expect myself to be doing.

But I told them I would be honored to attend their party.

And I mean it.

(now I have to bake cookies!)

One Year Ago:

(it makes me sad to read this
entry again, because it's a year
later and she's a year worse.
The person we all knew and loved
is gone.  Hints of her show up now and then,
but for all intents and purposes,
we are left with a shell of that
witty, intelligent, sparkling woman
who was Barbara Scott O'Donnell)

My tip of the week:
Go NOW to
Pictures to EXE Presentations
and download some of the fantastic
slide shows which have been
uploaded.  You wont be sorry!

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Created 12/08/01 by Bev Sykes