Today in My History
Books Read in 2022
Books Read in 2022
Cast (updated 7/21)
YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM DAVIS...
30 June 2022
I wrote this in 2007 and while a few items no longer make sense, I wanted to print it again because it was fun to read through.
There are several discussion groups on Facebook and one of them was "you know you're from Davis when...." It's hilarious, especially if you're actually from Davis. Ours is the town that has made the Weekly World News (that newspaper of the weird) more than once. Here are some examples given by people who know they are from Davis when...
...your family owns more bicycles than there are people in your family.
...there are 5 bike shops in town
...due to the extensive bike paths, it's quicker to bike somewhere than it is to drive.
...the highest crime rate is bike theft
...you leave town and are shocked to find that there are no bike paths in other cities.
...you have a whole section of town devoted to
Lord of the Rings
...you still go back and visit teachers years after graduating.
...you find nothing odd that there's a whole grocery store that caters to vegetarians and vegans.
...you see a vegetarian homeless person
...you see a BUSH04 sticker and realize there are other political parties.
...you remember when there was only one Nugget in
...your neighbor's house sold for a million dollars when, in any other town, it'd be worth four hundred thousand.
...your water is heated by solar panels.
...you have picnic in the park and Dinner at the Dump.
...you know that 3rd and B is not just an intersection.
...you know of people getting a noise violation for snoring
...you know 5 different routes to the same location because all the roads in Davis are connected
...you still think of "Robert E. Willett" as "WDI" (West Davis Intermediate) and "Caesar Chavez" as "WDE" (West Davis Elementary)
...you knew Robert E. Willett
... a city ordinance was passed to dim the streetlights so that you could see the stars better at night.
...trying to give directions you use landmarks that exist (i.e., "turn right at the big willow tree, then turn left after you pass the street with the tree in the middle of the road.")
...all directions anywhere start with "you know where Baskin Robbins is?"
...you don't realize that Davis Lumber has been Ace Hardware for years.
...we have 2 holidays over spring break: Easter, and Picnic Day
...you always buy Mother's Day gifts at the Whole Earth Festival.
...find it odd that not every town has 5 or so dance studios, all catering to several different styles.
...you know what someone is talking about when they say "the dominoes on the field"
...you get pissed off in a line of 3 cars.
...Gay Pride Day get proclamations from the City Council and County Board of Supervisors and a straight city council member shows up in drag.
...anything, and everything you say, can be twisted into something community leaders will consider to be offensive to any group imaginable in the entire human gene pool, including but not limited to one-armed bald eastern European midgets who talk with lisps. The city council would then instill courses into the curriculum to raise awareness that such groups even exist, and remove anything valuable from the curriculum to make place for the new courses.
...any kind of a controversial issue instantaneously spawns town-wide panic, protests, marches, emergency city council meetings, candle light vigils, TV news stories, apocalyptic hysteria and other bullshit, all to establish some moronic politically correct status quo for something that never was a real issue in the first place
...nobody thinks its strange that a 50,000 population town is a "nuclear free zone."
...the city council votes in favor of and builds a tunnel for toads for $14,000.
...the postmaster's father builds a town for and writes a book about the tunnel for toads.
...you get really nervous when someone goes to put a plastic/aluminum bottle in the trash can.
...you failed your driving test because you "failed to look for bikes" before turning right.
...the only hill you know is an overpass.
...everyone you know goes to the same optometrist.
...Wednesday night means Farmers Market
...you have stuck your hand in a cow's stomach.
...the police let the homeless guy keep a garden down by the railroad tracks.
...you have never had your car towed, but you have had your bike towed
...You don't know how to get to your friend's house by car because you have only ever gone by bike
...You get confused when you look up the prices for apartments in big city and discover that they are half the price you are paying on yours and people in said big city are complaining that rent is too expensive
...you call it Murder Burger [note: The name was changed to Redrum Burger because some folks thought that "Murder Burger" seemed too violent -- yes we have city council debates about such things!]
...you understand the archeological significance of potholes
...your first traffic violation was failure to wear a bicycle helmet
...seeing a kid with a huge back pack crammed with stuff, wearing a soccer uniform and carrying an instrument on his way to his music lesson is completely normal
...all your friends were on the cover of the local newspaper by the time they were 8
...you have known a significant amount of your friends since elementary school.
...you know that 'the Vets' isn't a place to take sick animals, but the Veterans Memorial Building
......you see nothing unusual about a Nutcracker whose cast of characters includes teddy bears, gnomes, country line dancers, swing dancers, bugs, bees, and insects.
The thing about this list is that I understood every single point on it and laughed myself silly as I looked at this town the way an outsider may see it.
PHOTO OF THE DAY
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