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This Day in My History

2000:  Things I Know Very Little About
2001:  Getting to the Bottom of Things
2002:  Living by the Numbers
2003:  Age of Aquarius
2004:  "Keep Away"
2005Transitions are Always Difficult


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IN MY OPINION
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Books Read in 2006
(Updated 10/30)

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Man with Three Buttocks
Conservative Party Speech
Blood Donor
Self Defense Class
Graham Chapman's Funeral

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Boo at the Zoo


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NOT A FASHION MAVEN

5 November 2006

I found this set of questions about clothes and fashion.  It's silly for me to even think about answering these questions, but perhaps that is a statement in and of itself.  I got to thinking about me and clothes when we were in Santa Barbara because the big question was "what are you wearing to the wedding?"  It had been so long since I cared about stuff like that that while I could get into the toes and fingernails and the hair-do thing for the camaraderie of it, clothes shopping is so far off the radar screen it's unbelievable.

1. Do you read articles about/ads for clothes?

Never.  Never, never, never, unless you count thumbing through the Lands End or Lane Bryant catalog and looking at things that (a) will look like shit on me and (b) I can't afford anyway.  Besides, how many pair of black pants can a person own?

2. Do you have a favorite brand or designer?

Oh sure.  Omar the Tentmaker.

3. Do you have more than a dozen pairs of shoes?

Bwahahahaha.  Shoes?  Me?  Shoe-ly you jest.  I do have seasonal shoes.  I wear Birkenstocks until my feet are too cold, then I switch to loafers or black walking shoes.  When Walt can shame me out to the gym, I put on "trainers" (I used to call them "tennis shoes," but they definitely aren't tennis shoes and they call them "trainers" in Australia and Ireland.  It seems so much more descriptive.)

I actually bought shoes in Australia and haven't worn most of them since I've been home, except the shoes I bought for Tom & Laurel's wedding, which one of the foster dogs ate, and the slippers that another dog ate (those would be the black and brown shoes below)

4. Do you wear clothes until they're worn out?

Well, I think that's pretty obvious.  Of course I do.  I wear clothes so long that not only are they threadbare, but I've also outgrown them and I still keep wearing them.  I presently have a couple of pairs of black pants I wear, and black velour pants I change into when we're going to the theatre.

5. Do you shop in used clothing shops?

It may look like I do, but I don't.  I don't know why I have a "thing" about used clothes.  I don't mind hand me downs, but to go into a shop and pick something that a stranger has brought in just doesn't turn me on.  I don't mind friends' cooties, or the cooties of friends of friends, but strangers' cooties bother me. My mother has a gorgeous wardrobe of things from the shop (run by Hospice of Marin) where she volunteers.  They get high class cooties, because it's Marin County.  I wouldn't even begin to guess how many pairs of shoes she has from there.  (Pre worn shoes?  Shudder!)

And besides, there is the usual problem:  nothing fits.  My friend Gerry was going to take me to Ross to get clothes for the wedding in Santa Barbara, having no concept whatsoever that when you are a person of size, you cannot shop at the usual outlet stores.  I've been to Ross on one of those "think thin" days and had to go eat a high calorie meal afterwards to suppress the depression.  And this was when I was still on my diet!

6. Do you remember clothes from your youth?

I don't remember clothes being a huge thing, since I went to 12 years of schools where we wore uniforms.  But I do remember a few things fondly.  I had the obligatory poodle skirt in the 50s, and another black shirt quilted with gold thread (the idea of my being thin enough to think of wearing something quilted is impossible to contemplate).  Then there was a gorgeous emerald green dress I wore one Christmas.  My mother loves the photo of me in it, and it is a pretty photo, but the adult me hates the photo because of how long it's been since I looked like that pretty, slim girl.  I did love frilly, girly stuff when I had the figure to wear it.

7. Would you like more expensive clothes than you now feel you can afford?

Since I don't really feel I can afford anything that doesn't have a Target label, sure.  I suspect that if you can pay top dollar, fat people can look fairly decent. 

8. Do you feel you have a color that flatters you or makes you feel more comfortable?

Red is my favorite color, but I seem to wear more blue in all shades than red.  I once had my colors done and the woman practically vomited in her disgust over the red I was wearing (which was on the orange side rather than on the blue side) and I'm never sure about reds any more.  (God that woman did a number on me.  What was supposed to be a fun party that I paid money to attend turned into a real traumatic evening for me.  I still cringe when I think about it)

9. Does it bother you if the people you are with don't seem to be dressed appropriately?

LOL.  I wouldn't know "appropriate" if it hit me in the face.  I also can't understand the people who are absolutely mortified if someone else is wearing the same thing.  I would probably think it was funny if someone showed up wearing the same thing I was wearing.  I just am not into clothes enough to care.

10. Do you watch awards shows to see what the stars are wearing?

Not really.  I enjoy watching the awards shows, and I appreciate when someone looks good and I can tell that wearing a swan draped around your neck isn't exactly "appropriate," but that's not why I watch awards shows.
 

PHOTO OF THE DAY

Probably "not appropriate" !

 

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