ONE MORE FOR THE
RESUME
17April 2003
When/if I leave this job, I'm going to have a whole lot of new experiences to put on a
resume. I'm not sure how many of them will get me a new job, though.
But first the good news. We hired a new rad tech. This one came with valid license
clutched in her hot little hand. Once burned, twice shy around our office. [Interestingly,
Dr. G talked with a local rad tech about possibly doing some moonlighting to come in and
teach our new person about this specific machine, since she's done the work, but not on
this machine, and T got all of the high-priced training. When Dr. G explained our
circumstances and mentioned that our first tech had turned out to have been trying to pull
a scam, he said "Oh? Her name wouldn't have been T, would it?" Turns out T had
pulled the wool over their eyes (briefly) as well. I'm not sure if that makes me feel
better or not, but at least we're not alone!]
Dr. G seems to be trusting me more these days. Today he had me write a letter for him, and
pronounced it "perfect." Be still my heart. He's also asked my advice on things,
and routinely has me do his computer things, since he is not exactly computer illiterate,
but he learns new things on the computer grudgingly because he has no other choice. With
me, he has a choice, and 99% of the time his choice is to have me take care of it for him.
Soon we'll be taking over a portion of the office web site and I'll be keeping that up to
date. It's horrendously out of date at present and I've been itching to get my hands on
it, but it will still take some time before it's set up so I can do that.
In the meantime, I'm just learning my new job duties. Lessee. What have I learned since I
took this job a year and a half ago?
- For one thing, like "the dreaded overpass" the
"dreaded bank statement" doesn't terrify me any more. I'm not saying
that I routinely balance. In fact, I don't think I've ever balanced, but
I'm "close enough," Dr. G tells me. (I can hear accountants all over the
country cringing.
- I've discovered that the yucky medical stuff I thought I wouldn't
have the stomach for are really OK. I can remove a bloody "sheath" from an
ultrasound wand without flinching any more. I can scrub speculums with the best of
'em and perform screening evaluations on a feces smear on a piece of gauze.
- I've learned to be a bone density technician, read and interpret
scores, handle the bare feet of strangers, and live to tell the tale.
- I've learned how--with much coaching--to help with simple office
procedures, from filling a bladder with sterile water to holding genital areas open, to
setting up the ultrasound machine and working some of the controls when Dr. G's hands are
otherwise occupied.
- I know a lot more about insurance (hate it), bookkeeping (hate it),
and watering plants (hate, hate, hate it).
But I have to admit I wasn't ready for my newest upcoming job.
As I've stated here before, one of the procedures Dr. G does (and thank goodness he
does or my hit counter would be only half of what it is now!) is labioplasty, which is a
fancy word for plastic surgery on the labia--the lips of the vagina. The procedures
he has done have been for purposes of making overly large labia smaller. You can do
cosmetic manipulation on just about any body part, I've come to realize!
Now, Dr. G is a man who is very proud of his work (I suppose all
surgeons do this, but it always seems strange). When he does a procedure, he takes
picture. Big pictures. 5x7 glossy pictures, which he then puts in the
patient's chart. If she wants a copy, he'll give her one (this goes for things that
are removed from the body cavity as well--tumors, tubes, whatever--it's all photographed).
So he came in with these "gorgeous" (he tells me) photos
of his latest procedure. If I posted them here, this site could easily get an X
rating, so I won't. Even if it's all medical, you know--not sexual.
I once asked him how he got the films developed and he said he just
took them to Long's photo department. You gotta know there are blackmarket copies of
his prints floating all over this town!
I can just see the photo guys when Dr. G walks in. "Hey
Charlie! Dr. G is back with some of his surgery photos" (wink-wink,
nudge-nudge)
But this time when he came in with the photos, he had discovered the
wonderful world of digital photography and someone in the OR had a digital camera, so he
was able to get photos instantly--and cheat the guys in the photo lab out of the fun of
developing the pictures.
"Do you have a digital camera?" he asked me. I said
I did. "Good--you can take the 'after' pictures."
So when the patient comes in in about 3 weeks to make sure that
everything has healed well and she's all back to normal again, it will be me sitting on
that little stool at the foot of the table with my camera pointed where the sun don't
shine.
I'm just trying to figure out how I put that on a resume.
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