ESPECIALLY CHOSEN--JUST FOR ME!

26 November 2002

I love Amazon.com. I must love Amazon, I sometimes feel like I am single-handedly keeping the company in business.

One thing I love about Amazon is that it keeps track of my purchases and whenever I log on, it has more stuff that, knowing what I like, it feels I can't possibly pass up.

Today for example, it suggests that I might like to buy:

"An Army at Dawn," a comprehensive look at the 1942-1943 Allied invasion of North Africa.

"Star Wars--Episode II--The Attack of the Clones" (plus more action/adventure classics that I might enjoy just as much)

Elton John's Greatest Hits 1970-2002 and an Eminem compilation album.

"Barbie as Rapunzel" video.

I'm trying to figure out what in God's name I ordered that would trigger Amazon to suggest any of these items as "perfect" for me.

Maybe it was buying one of Tom Brokaw's books for a gift for someone last Christmas made Amazon think I have a passion for war books. But I have to admit that I truly have no interest in reading about the 1942-43 Allied invasion of North Africa.

Maybe there was a Star Trek purchase (but I can't remember one) which made Amazon think that I would also love Star Wars, but my interest in Star Wars ended with the first movie (I slept through the second one). Maybe it's because I periodically buy David Gerrold books, which I buy only because he's a friend, not because I'm a sci fi nut. (Speaking of which, his "The Martian Child," the novella that won him the Hugo, has now been expanded into a full length book--I recommend it. It's the semi-autobiographical story of the adoption of his son, though it does take off in the area of fantasy as well. I also recommend his new trio, starting with "Jumping off the Planet," not because it's the best thing he ever wrote, but because he created this wonderful character who is the lesbian partner of the mother of the kids in the book. Her name happens to be Bev Sykes. I think Bev has her biggest role in the story with book 2, "Bouncing off the Moon.")

So let's assume that it's my friendship with David that has triggered the suggestion that I am panting after the latest Star Wars to roll off the line.

But let's take those music suggestions. Elton John...Eminem????? I mean really! I think the only music I've ever ordered through Amazon is John Denver, Judy Garland and Rosemary Clooney. Now tell me what in that eclectic list would have led Amazon to think I can't live without Eminem??

However, I am most insulted with the suggestion that I would jump at the chance to buy anything having to do with Barbie. First of all, I am too old to have been a Barbie fan when she first appeared. In the second place, I have never, ever in my entire life been interested in anything remotely having to do with Barbie. Now if it were a Rosie O'Donnell doll, which is proportioned more like a human being, I might understand, but really! BARBIE???

Amazon's "especially for you" suggestions used to be fairly easy to figure out, and actually I have been tempted to purchase some of the "can't miss" things that have been suggested and chosen especially for me.