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25 November 2002

Susan is dead.

Ned sent me an e-mail to let me know. He said he doesn't have any details, but just found out.

Susan is...was...the mother of Ned's best friend. She was a good friend of ours. Apparently she went to take a nap and never woke up.

I am sitting here stunned. Writing this because...well...because writing is what I do when I feel like this. But I have no answers. I only have emotions and the emotions are bouncing all over the place right now.

I only found out ten minutes ago.

I went looking for information on Susan through Google. In her younger years she had been a dancer with the Rockettes. Later she founded the magazine Dance Teacher Now and still later a second magazine, Stage Directions (a magazine especially for community theatre people). She ran both out of her living room here in Davis for years until they got big enough that she moved them to an office in West Sacramento, and then moved the whole operation to North Carolina. She sold both magazines a few years ago and has been retired.

I found a cite for a tribute to Susan on the eve of her retirement, but it's one of those articles that you can only get if you subscribe to the magazine.

She had MS, which I didn't know until I'd known her for a long time. She had one of the milder cases and it was only in the last few years that she even began needing a cane to walk.

Several years ago, we were traveling in England and Ireland with my mother. Before we left, we learned that Susan and her friend Rosemary were also going to be traveling in Ireland, so we made plans to meet them for dinner and a show one night.

susanetc.jpg (23258 bytes)
This photo is from the night in Ireland...
My mother is on the left, Susan is in the middle
and cousin Nora--who just had major heart surgery--
is on the right.  Bad photo but...

It really was a fun evening--especially the weirdness of meeting someone from home in Ireland for dinner.

The last time we saw her, she was out here visiting her grandchildren. We got caught up on what all of our children were doing now and we planned to see her again on her next trip out here.

I can't believe there will not be another trip.

Part of me feels like I did being stranded in England on 9/11/01. So frustrated at being separated from the people I love, wanting to go to a safe place and hold tight so nobody can be hurt again, so I won't lose anyone again.

But that's not how life works. Life is full of love and loss and friendship and.... I don't know. My brain is in a total jumble right now.  I wish my stomach would stop doing somersaults.

I can't believe Susan is gone.

Quote of the Day

One day the sun will emerge.
And every night my friends will visit me
and I will kiss them in my dreams."

~ Michael Sugar

Photo of the Day

tribute03.jpg (3381 bytes)

This is a photo of Susan which
accompanied an article she wrote
in 2000 as a tribute to Fred Kelly,
Gene's brother (that's Fred in the photo)



One Year Ago
The Sound of Silence
When the power went off, all I could think of were things that I wanted to do that involved electricity--make coffee, vacuum, run a load of wash, fill the dishwasher and run it.

Two Years Ago
From the Sublime to the Ridiculous
After that lovely time communing with nature, listening to the birds singing, watching the snow on the trees and along the lake's edge, we got about as far away from nature as you can get: we met the rest of the family at the Silverado casino in Reno.

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Created 11/19/02