STICK-TO-IT-IVISM

6 March 2002

I'm just wasting away to a shadow of my former self. A LARGE shadow, to be sure, but a shadow nonetheless.

The Weight Watchers scales show another drop--2.6 lbs this week, which makes a total of 28.4 lbs. (Gotta take every single tenth of a pound!)

I'm getting into the whole Weight Watchers thing. I'm still not exactly loquacious and have only spoken up in a meeting once. The "rah-rah team" attitude bothers me. I never ask for a star as a "bravo point" because I did something good during the week, but there are helpful topics discussed and I'm not finding the leader quite as obnoxious as I did originally.

Oh she's not obnoxious. She's a very nice person. And I can relate to her because she lost a lot of weight and has kept it off for 11 years. But she's there to be a cheerleader (and to hawk Weight Watchers products) and that kind of turned me off in the beginning.

But under all that perkiness is a good message and helpful information. Last week she talked about the importance of exercise. The sort of meeting I would have dreaded two months ago, but now that I've entered the exercise world, I could sit there smugly listening to ways that you can add activity to your life, even if it's only 2 minutes a day to begin. Having just come from a 45 minute workout, I felt very proud of myself (but didn't ask for any "bravo points")

This week's topic was persistence and tricks to keep going when it's tough. That was a helpful meeting. I'm at the point in this "eating plan" where I always sabotage myself. I've lost a nice chunk of weight and am feeling proud. Some clothes are fitting better. If I look at pictures, there is a somewhat noticeable difference. I've also spent the past two months cooking. I'm a good cook, but I'd reached the point where after 30+ years of trying to prepare meals with some imagination to them, I was just plain bored with it. I fixed whatever was easy. That's how I got into bad eating habits to begin with. Too much trouble to fix a salad, or prepare a soup--just grab something that you can slap between a couple of slices of bread.

Whenever I start a new eating plan, I get involved in the preparation of food. I read a lot of recipes, pour over cookbooks, check the Internet for good-sounding ideas, do a lot of shopping, fill the vegetable drawer with fresh veggies and cook up a storm, breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Problem is that it wears thin at about this time. I think that's why I had a peanutbutter day the other day. Why I've been having the munchies this week. This is the time to keep the snacks--no matter how low in points--out of the house because the idea is to learn to eat more sensibly, not just to keep points down.

I've also been having a difficult time eating enough on this diet. The point ranges are based on what you weigh. As you lose more weight, your point range drops, but whoever designed this diet has calculated that if you weigh more, you need more energy to keep going.

Well, I've been at least 5 points under every day (and that doesn't even include the 4 additional points I earn each day from exercise).

The "being under" was partly because I'd been fixing easier meals--a sandwich for lunch, "something with chicken in it" for dinner, etc. Today I decided I need to make a real effort to eat at least the minimum number of points, and concentrate on fixing nutritious snacks instead of grabbing the first thing that I come to.

For example, I had a bad case of the munchies in the early afternoon. The problem was that I hadn't planned well and had not taken a real "lunch" to work. I had a container of yogurt at work, so I ate that. But it wasn't enough. Now, my usual habit would be to come home and eat something snacky, not "meal-y". Within the points, but not really the best choice. Instead, I decided to eat a bowl of cereal with milk. It wasn't "breakfast" time, but I knew it would be more satisfying and be better for me than some empty snack, and that it would hold me better than, say, an apple.

It worked. No grumbling stomach, no nagging cravings or anything else for the rest of the afternoon until around 5, which was a couple of hours before dinnertime. (Walt gets home from work late and we generally eat between 7 and 8). Again, I had to think of something nutritious that would calm the cravings and yet be something good for me. I "fried" (PAM and a nonstick pan) some onions and mushrooms and wrapped them up in a corn tortilla with some salsa. 2 points total. And three vegetables in the serving.

The good thing is that I'm aware of "how I get" at this point in trying to establish a new eating pattern. I recognize the danger signals, and I'm determined that I'm not going to let them sabotage me this time around. Sticking with the WW meetings (whether I like them or not), and recording every bite that I eat in a food journal is, so far, keeping me on track and helping me make better food choices--as well as identify dangerous patterns when they start to form.