NOTHING'S TOO GOOD FOR DEAR OL' DAD

June 12, 2002

Yeah, I know it's not Father's day yet, but I've had exciting e-mail and I thought I would share some important gift ideas for you to give to Dad on his day.

This comes courtesy of my friend Terry, at BonusTree.com, a thoughtful fellow who has certainly worked hard at coming up with all sorts of goodies for Dad.

There are so many good ideas that it's difficult to choose. Fortunately, I don't generally get Walt anything for Father's day (he started the tradition by stating that since I wasn't his mother, he didn't need to do anything for me on Mother's Day. Sure has made Father's Day easier for me!)

But for those of you who haven't finished your Father's Day shopping yet, how about free delivery on the prescription of your choice (must be at least $10). As this is the very first item on the list of the BonusTree list of gifts for Dad, I can only assume that there are fathers all over the country hoping for a nicely wrapped bottle of Prozac (or Viagra). What a wonderful way to say "I love you, Dad."

If that doesn't do it for you, you might want to consider a Blood Pressure monitor, digital pedometer--or best of all, a body fat monitor! What a great way to honor dad--let him check to see how fat he is.

Perhaps Dad might like a more sparkling smile. BonusTree has Rembrandt tooth whitening kits too. If Santa didn't fill Dad's stocking with toothpaste last Christmas, here's your chance to make up for it now.

There are just so many goodies from which to choose that I'm rather glad my father is no longer among the living--I wouldn't know what to get him.

There are other things--a massager that comes with a free box of Clif bars. (I've recently learned about Clif, which makes the Luna Bars, which are ridiculously expensive power bars made especially for women--we haven't figured out exacty what makes them special for women yet). I'm not sure if you eat the Clif bars before or after you use the body fat monitor.

And then there is Body Clear Bodywash. "Hey, Dad--been out mowing the lawn in the heat? Uh....here's some soap for you..."

If all else fails, there's always the "Wrinkle Cure Book." Now there's something every father has put on his Amazon Wish List, I'm sure.

Drugstore.com, which seems to be in cahoots with BonusTree.com has its own not-to-be missed Dad's Day specials. How about some exfoliating face scrub? Or a nose and ear hair trimmer? (they don't say if gift wrapping is included with these gifts.)

I'm going to be spending a lot of time trying to help my children decide what to give their Dad for father's day. I'm leaning toward the Golf Zen Garden. Walt doesn't play golf, and I'm not quite sure how zen enters into golf, but it might be worth investigating.

But then I heard from my friends at Fillmore Pockets and they have some gifts, too, which need to be considered. Now these guys say, "...have dad register with Upromise.com and then have him purchase a gift through Upromise's unique "Save for College" programs. Part of the qualified purchase price will go towards your Upromise college education account. This gift will keep giving all year!"

Now is that a perfect gift of what? You give Dad a URL and he goes there to spend money on you. Surely that is in the spirit of being a Dad, right?

ArcaMax is offering you free gifts for Dad if you buy a digital camera. Such a deal! Buy yourself that digital camera you've been eyeing, and they'll throw in a tape measure for Dad. He doesn't have to know you didn't pay for it and--hey--you can record the delighted smile on his face with your new camera.

 Hey--didja see that number below?  I'm 0.4 lb from 60 lbs lost (gee--if I hadn't gained 0.4 lbs last week, I'd be at 60 now! ) You know?  50 somehow didn't seem like that big a deal, but 60 seems like a very big deal indeed (maybe because the weight lost is now almost exactly equal to the years I've lived...or something!)