...the Journal

Mom's
Refrigerator Door

I wasn't sure which magnet to start with, but since this is "funny the world," the smiley face seemed the most logical. Once I decided I was going to start collecting magnets, I now look for perfect magnets whenever we travel. We visited Jeri in Boston, for the first time, a few months after Paul's death. I debated whether I wanted to make the Boston magnet a smiley face, but it seemed perfect. Paul and I had an in-joke going about smiley faces and tried always to get each other ridiculous smiley face "things."


STOP BEFORE YOU FORWARD!

For everyone who loves to pass along Internet scares, gossip, offers too good to pass up, petitions, etc, please take time to check the web site on Urban Legends to make sure that the whole thing is legitimate before you annoy your friends, co-workers and acquaintances.


ARE YOU HOT?

The current "hot spot" seems to be Are You Hot Or Not. I know people who have really become addicted to it.


And one can never recommend The Hunger Site too often. Go there. Send food to hungry people.

 

SMILE, THOUGH YOUR
HEART IS BREAKING

3 January 2001

Since I’m displaying the smiley face magnets, it seems a good time to talk about the name of this journal, and my history with smiley faces. Someone told me a long time ago that she almost didn’t read this journal when the initial format used smiley face wallpaper and she thought it "too cutesy." But that was absolutely the most perfect format for me, and for the theme of my journal.

Smiley faces entered my life, thanks to Paul, somewhere in his early adolescence. Paul was not real good about buying gifts for people. In fact, throughout his life, giving gifts was not really something that he was consistent about. But it must have been Mother’s Day one year when he gave me the smiley faces. It was a gawdawful necklace out of plastic and string and he definitely was not serious when he gave it to me, but for years afterwards, whenever a gift giving occasion would come up, he’d remind me about the "lovely" smiley face necklace he’d given me.

It got to be a family joke and as the years passed, Paul and I started giving each other smiley face gifts. Two Christmases before he died, it was a smiley Christmas. I found a smiley blanket, a tie, and a bunch of other stuff. And that Christmas he also received "Happy," a smiley face doll that laughs and says "that’s funny" when you press its hand. Happy became Paul’s constant companion. When he and Audra became engaged, he was their "child" and he traveled everywhere -- even to Belgium when Paul was best man in a wedding -- with them.

When Paul and Audra were married, "Happy" was the ring bearer at the wedding and they rigged a line for him to slide down with Audra’s ring attached to a pillow attached to his hand.

The official photo of Paul and Audra’s wedding is of the two of them sitting together with Happy.

And the cake I made for the wedding was decorated with smiley faces.

When Paul's memorial service was held, I wore the smiley face beads. Fortunately I didn't have them on at the gravesite, or I would have put them into the grave with him. Instead, they now decorate our tree as our memorial to Paul each year.

And so, when it came to choose the title for this journal, thinking of our in-joke regarding smiley faces, and also the lyrics to the Lawsuit song, one of my favorite songs ("Funny," the lyrics of which appear on the front page of this journal), it seems that there could be no more appropriate title--or theme.

Smiley faces used to make me laugh. Now they make me smile, wistfully. I'd love to be able to exchange joke gifts with Paul again.


 


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Created 1/3/01 by Bev Sykes