A Krispy Kreme donut shop opened up in Sacramento recently. People lined up for an hour to taste what has apparently become a sensation in the donut world. Word of mouth (so to speak) has really made a hit of these donuts. A friend, who has had access to them for a long time on the east coast, described them as “absolutely the finest artery-hardenin' stomach stuffers ever made!” I didn’t know what about them made them so good, but I was determined to try one.

I love donuts. There was a time when we were in college where we would stop by a donut store on the north side of UC Berkeley. They served warm-from-the-fryer donuts which we’d eat, washing them down with hot chocolate topped with a thick dollops of real whipped cream. Absolute ambrosia.

Even further back in my childhood I remember standing on a street corner in downtown San Francisco watching an automatic donut-fryer assembly line make donuts in front of a view window. Watch the machine cut out the donuts, then pass them on a conveyer belt down to a vat of hot fat, watch them turn golden brown and then be flipped out onto a rack to drain. Eat those babies hot from the cooker. Oh man was that livin’.

So as I listened to the growing frenzy over Krispy Kremes, my mouth began to water for donuts. I couldn’t imagine what could make these better than other donuts, but as much as I wanted to try them, I wasn’t going to stoop to admitting I was the kind of person who would line up for hours to taste a donut. Instead I passed by a hole in the wall donut shop in downtown Sacramento. I was the only person at the counter and I ordered two glazed donuts (my favorites are either glazed or sugar donuts--none of the frosting jazz for me). These were potato donuts, I recognized from the texture (See? I am a connoisseur!). And they were gooooood. Krispy Kremes would have to go some to beat these babies--and apparently I was one of the few who had discovered this out of the way shop.

I continued to hear reports of Krispy Kremes. Ned’s radio station occasionally gets shipments of Krispy Kremes to give away in promotional deals. I’ve never asked for one. But again, people line up for hours to get a taste of the famous Krispy Kremes.

In the meantime, I went back to my secret donut store in Sacramento and tried the donuts again. Still as good as I remembered. Ned and Marta didn’t join us for Thanksgiving, but called to talk with everyone and be there in spirit. While on the phone, Ned talked about Krispy Kremes and how they had given the station more donuts to give away, and that because it was the day after Thanksgiving, when folks may be out of town, they ended up with left overs. LEFT overs????? This was my big chance. I passed along the message that I wanted to taste a Krispy Kreme donut.

When we got home yesterday, there they lay on a plate on our kitchen counter: 3 Krispy Kreme donuts, covered in plastic wrap. They looked shiny, covered with glaze. They smelled delicious. I remembered my friend’s promise: “absolutely the finest artery-hardenin' stomach stuffers ever made!” If there was something I was hungry for after stuffing myself with Thanksgiving food it was a nice artery-hardening, stomach stuffing donut.

Ceremoniously, I unwrapped the donut. I cut it in half. I picked it up. I examined it. It was thinner than the donuts at my secret store. But that’s OK. ‘Cause apparently the thing that makes these babies so good is that they are loaded with fat (hey--if you’re going to go junk food, might as well go all the way).

I took a bite. Yeah. OK. Not bad.

I took another bite. So where were the bells and whistles? What was all the fuss about? It was a donut after all. It was better than Enteman’s. It was better than the store-baked donuts that I get at the supermarket. But it wasn’t the be all and end all of comfort foods. It wasn’t crispy. It wasn’t creamy. It wasn’t even as good as the donut I bought at my secret store. It was just a bloody donut.

I thought about all those folks who lined up for hours to get a taste of Krispy Kremes. I wondered if they were glad they’d done it. I wondered if they were swept off their feet in waves of ecstacy at the best donut they’d ever tasted.

Or was this simply the food equivalent of The Emperor’s New Clothes?